Early reports from the North Pole indicate that a rather rotund, bearded man has loaded thousands of flat panel LCDs onto a sleigh and is preparing for a journey to points south. The unusual weight of the LCDs has caused concern for the maintenance crew of the legendary sleigh, but they are confident that recent design changes to accommodate the boss’ increased girth will prove sufficient.
Observers inside Santa’s Workshop have reported that even Kris Kringle has embraced the benefits of digital signage. The Workshop has recently abandoned static signs urging elf safety and displaying productivity measures. In their place are large screens dynamically updated to keep the busy elves aware of changing consumer wishes, with constant reminders of proper and safe lifting techniques. On one wall, faces of nice children from around the world flash by on dozens of displays, reminding the elves who they are working for. On the opposite wall, several screens display the faces of naughty children, as a scrolling ticker details their transgressions. Several grumpy elves observe these screens as they load lumps of coal into Santa’s bag.
Outside in the staging area, a massive LED display shows the planned route of the fully loaded sleigh. Reindeer technicians check the hooves of Santa’s sleigh team, while wind and weather conditions are served up on the display’s sidebar from major destinations across the globe. Excitement is in the air, as a full year of preparation comes to a head.
Santa is seen compulsively checking his iPhone to review the various lists that a man in his position must maintain. And to be truthful, he loves the AroundMe application that helps him find the nearest place for milk and cookies, no matter where he is. One of Santa’s lists is specific to the Digital Signage Industry. Our reporters were able to extract pieces of it via Bluetooth while Santa was working out.
For Dave Haynes: Free drinks in Las Vegas for being even-handed and entertaining
For Adrian Cotterill: An autographed replica of Tom Petters’ ankle bracelet
For Jim Granger: Two sharp swords
For Chris Gibbs: Two tickets to a Phillies game
For Bill Gerba: Two extra hours in every day
For the Strategy Institute: Daily email reminders to register for next year’s gift
For CoolSign team members: Digital business cards with changing logos
For DS-IQ: A big WalMart smiley face
For network entrepreneurs: Guts, vision and sources of capital
For advertisers: The wisdom to allocate dollars to out-of-home media
For RDM team members, customers, prospects and partners: Comfort and joy
For all industry participants: A healthy and prosperous 2009